The Life After

For two consecutive days, I've dreamt of my brother. The first one was
nothing extraordinary. Just me, Jermaine and him in our old van.
Jermaine was driving and Jayson was in the passenger seat as usual and
me at the back. I can't remember where we went but it looked something
like a school. While waiting for something, I asked him if he could
teach me how to drive since Jermaine already knew how. I was putting my
arms around him like a clingy girlfriend and he was reciprocating the
deed. I really miss him and the utter loneliness I'm going through
right now probably summoned him to my dreams.

For
the second time, I dreamt of him as I took a nap this noon before going
to work. Never had I a dream that was so clear and vivid… We were
outside my front door, squatting as I tried to figure out what to say.
He's got black-eye in both eyes but otherwise, his face looked ok.
No shadow was casted over his face and so I could see every feature of
him as if he were alive. I even joked about his black-eye and he
laughed. I reached out my hand and tried to touch his arm. It was
amazingly scary when I felt the stickiness of his skin from sweat. I
wouldn't be surprised if I would be able to smell him from my dreams.

I
asked him how he was and said he was ok. We stood up simultaneously and
I asked, "Can you take me with you?" He gently pushed me away but I was
already clinging on to him. The next thing I knew was, we were in a
park that seemed familiar but not exactly, walking side by side. I
could no longer see things as clearly as few moments ago but the
conversation went on. I said, "Have you seen Jesus, God and Mama Mary?"
I got no reply. "Or is it just like on earth where in we believe in
them although we can't really see them?" Still no reply. That's the
last thing I could remember.

I never had such a dream where I
could not see the other person's lips moving, but I could definitely
hear the voices. Where is he really right now? Could he still be
wandering about? He's with me.  I miss him and I feel so alone. I
lost two people in a span of 3 months. At least my brother is still
here trying to take care of me… And I'm just grateful. I wish I could
be with him soon…

Adidas Fun Run

For those who are interested in joining the Adidas Fun Run 2006:

When:                                  September 17, 2006   
Regustration Venue:         Ground Floor, Vasquez Madrigal Plaza
                                               51 Annapolis St., Greenhills, San Juan
Registration Fee:               P250

For more information, you may contact Ms. Baby at 09174568277.

Have fun!!!

The -ber Quarter

10 Thoughts About the Last Quarter of 2006:

1. It's almost Christmas and I don't know how we're going to celebrate it now that my brother's gone. We would still take our annual family pic for the calendar and I'd just photoshop Jayson.

2. New Year 2007 and Jayson won't be here to fire that annoying thingy he made years ago. It's gonna be a year since I brought him to the ER.

3. This was supposed to be the first Christmas we're going to spend together somewhere, probably in cruise… NOT!

4. I'm starting on new job away from Makati, hopefully a fresh start.

5. Pro rata 13th month or worse none at all since I'm getting my salary in gross. But hopefully there would be a bonus from the Singaporeans.

6. I'm so excited about the long-awaited Bohol/Cebu trip next week!

7. My little sister's turning 7 this October! I'm planning to give her a Jollibee party since she's been the best sister ever. She deserves it.

Well, well… so much happened this year… I just hope next year is a better one for all of us….

Where is the passion for personal art?

I can't remember the last time I really took time to do something for nothing. It's true what our professors back in college told us: "Take advantage of this time (university years) doing artworks for your own satisfaction because when you start working, almost everything you would do would be for the company, client and money." True enough…

It's more than two years since I've graduated and more than two years since I last held a brush or pencil to actually draw something. Looking back to those years when you only worry about plates and passing the minor subjects, I realized that I haven't really gone somewhere. I still take things for granted. I still do things because they are required. Not that I don't enjoy doing them but the passion is not exactly there.

This is two of the last works that I seriously did. I don't find it impressive but it's close to my heart since it's my brother and sister. So I guess this two are among my few, or if not only, special works.

This one is my favorite. Denisse was just about 4 years old then and loving the camera.

I want my own Digital SLR so I could get back on creative track. Hopefully, by the end of September I could produce something "special" again.

Another Fun Run!

Red Cross Takbong Alay Sagip Buhay Fun Run 2006. This is my second fun run, just less than a month after Milo's… and it was sure fun!!!

I went home early Saturday night after my salsa class so that I could get at least 5 hours of sleep, but for some reason my energy was in the highest level and as much as I tried to sleep, I just couldn't. So I decided to just stay up and wait for the clock to strike 3. At 4am, I was off to Quezon City Circle. I thought they were going to postpone the run again (for the third time) since it was raining really hard. But I guess this time, nothing would stop anyone from running.

Nothing could beat running 5 kilometers under the rain, from QC Circle North Ave entrance all the way down to UP's oblation and back. I've always wanted to run in the rain and during the run, I was laughing like crazy. I don't know, it just made me so happy. It's like I was so free, I could run on the road without caring if my white t-shirt was dripping wet. A few have the opportunity to do so.

I was hoping for a sub 35 minutes and until now I'm still feeling really disappointed why I didn't ask the person at the finish line for my time. It wasn't like Milo where they took everyone's finishing time. They only had the top 10 finishers'. Dang! I don't know how I did, but I'm certain it was under 35 or even 30. There were still a lot of people behind me and and I know I only walked for a minute and a half and my pacing was pretty good.

I can't believe I commuted home to Pasig all the way from Quezon City still wet carrying a hideous, cheap, green plastic bag (my finisher singlet, a bottle of mineral water and some Fita biscuits from Red Cross)! Well, it was worth it. Can't wait for the Adidas run in September though. I'm doing 10K again…And please, I need to buy a new pair of running shoes! My big toes are getting tortured…